Thursday, April 2, 2009

Single AND Successful?

It has to be one of the questions I hate hearing the most.

"Why don't you have a boyfriend?"

Blah. What do you mean WHY. There are tonnes of reasons why, but is it any of any one's business? It's usually NOT the reasons the people assume. What does it really matter to anyone but the single filly in question?

"But you are so beautiful/ smart/ fun/ sweet/ rich/ desperate/ drunk/ you fill in the rest".

Ya know what? Most people KNOW these things. They don't need someone coming up and telling them they are so great so "why don't they have a bf"? What's so GREAT about being in a relationship anyways? Are only good people in relationships? Can good people NOT be in relationships and still be considered good people?

You never hear anyone ask "Why DO you have a boyfriend?". "You're so smart, pretty, fun, and cool you would be better off single!" Well at least I've never heard anyone ask that.

Why is that? How come in this world you are nothing, people feel sorry for you, are condescending towards you, and think there is something wrong with you if you are single?

I am NOT anti-relationship. I know all the great things can come from having a deep loving bond with someone. That doesn't mean my life is shit because I don't have that bond right now. Nor does it mean that I am out searching day and night for it, or want it.

I admit, there are nights when I wish I had someone to cuddle into. Evenings when I wouldn't mind curling up for a flick, or heading out on the town with my gentleman. However, there are those memories of being in a relationship and having to give up riding time, girls nights, or just alone time to keep the boyfriend happy. Memories of having to explain why I spend 4 hours a night at the barn and why I hate sitting on the couch watching TV doing nothing. Memories of jealousy when I booked my first trip to Cuba.

I know these are things that come with the territory of being a "couple". Just like there are perks, there are conditions also. The same applies for singles, (although I do believe we have more freedom). I just want to remind everyone that being a couple isn't the be all and end all. Sure it can be nice, but so can being single. Please don't patronize us single people for being single. A lot singles are that way by CHOICE, not because no one will date them! Whether they don't have time, don't have the interest, or just plain don't care, they have made a choice and are happy. Just like there are ups and downs of being a couple, there are ups and downs of being single.

A single filly is doing all the work in life that a couple would do together. We have it a lot harder but we don't feel slighted. We are strong, successful, and happy. Please remember this next time you feel the need to ask the dreaded question....or say "don't worry, some day you'll find the one"

gag me with a wooden spoon.


  1. I believe you ought to respond to that question with another inquisitive remark: 'Why don't you think your questions through before asking them? Who knows, you might save the planet some energy'.

    Greetings from London.

  2. Good blog, who needs to be strapped down to a needy guy anyways? Too many people are in relationships for the sake of not being alone. What is so scary about being alone? I'd rather be alone than be with someone that causes me stress. Ponies are much more loyal lovers, no head games!

  3. A great post from my counterpart!



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