Monday, November 21, 2011

I Have An Opinion

  On almost everything... I have continuously struggled in my adult hood to know when to offer my opinion, and when to keep it to myself.  I hate to think I am a know - it - all, but realize I might come across that way to some people.  In reality I like to offer my opinion because I am genuinely trying to help, and think I can through personal experiences I have gone through on my own.  You see once upon a time my life was pretty chaotic.  I have had some major blows, made some major mistakes, and climbed my way back up to where I am now.  I have gained a lot of things I have always strived for and I attribute that to learning from my mistakes - and the help of close family and friends.  I sometimes think I would hate to see someone go through all the pain and stress I have on occasion to get to the place they need to be.  I would like to just tell them - there is a way to skip it all if you would just listen to what I'm saying.  No one ever does. It's human nature.

  When you express your opinion and that person does not want to hear what you particularly have to say, you can create some major conflict.  This is what I did today.  How do you know when to speak up; and when you just need to shut your mouth and mind your own business?  I have really been struggling lately watching people who are close to me making seriously bad choices.  Do they think they are bad choices? No, I do.  What gives me the right to judge their situation and make an opinion on the matter, and then go ahead and relay that opinion to them?  I don't think I have the right to.  I just think I HAVE to, because I want something to smack these people back into reality and get their heads on straight.  Do they appreciate this? No.  Why oh why do I do it?

  Back in those days when I had some interesting times, I had a close friend who one day voiced his very strong opinion to me about one of the choices I was making with my life.  I didn't want to hear it, but I knew inside he was right.  He and my roommate both sat me down and told me to smarten up, stop being blinded and see that I have become a different person and I NEED to make a change NOW.  I saw the truth in their eyes, they were genuinely worried for me.  I never felt mad at them for expressing their opinion about a certain someone to me.  I appreciated their honesty and how much they cared to tell me.  I changed my life forever that day and still thank them in my heart for that.   

  I find it impossible to sit on the sidelines and watch my friends make decisions that I know are bad bad bad and going to cause nothing but heartache and ruined lives.  Sometimes I speak up, sometimes I don't.   Today I did and I may have lost a friend forever.  I am not trying to get people to do things I want them to do, just trying to show them the situation they are in and how it effects the people around them and the hard truths they will eventually have to face.  If that makes me a bad person then I guess I am.  I am only trying to be a friend and protect them.  

 I guess people need to learn these things for themselves, and go through the lesson on their own to learn from it.  It's just so hard to sit by and watch.



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  2. It's so funny that you posted this now. I have always been opinionated and LOUD about it. I don't try to cram my opinions down people's throats, but I do get pretty adamant when it comes to things I feel are REALLY important (like animal neglect). When I was younger, I used to stir up trouble online as an outlet for pent up anger I had in real life. Then I grew up. In the last year I have tried really hard to cut the drama out of my life entirely, but it still finds me. Two days ago, I made the mistake of replying to a comment on an internet forum and it BLEW UP. Drama llama all over the place! I need to learn when to NOT SPEAK. It's not worth it. Good luck keeping me quiet IRL though!

  3. Glad I'm not the only one. I do think people like you and I mean it with the best intentions, just the people aren't willing to hear what the truth may be.

    What forum were you on?

  4. You are definitely not the only one! I certainly don't mean to, and generally try to stop and think before I say anything, but I can't help myself sometimes!

    Don't feel bad, I probably am worse than you!

  5. I hear you loud and clear!
    I am very similar!!


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